Like Mother Like Daughter? (Ask)

[Lady Zahra/Jules]

*When she had awoken, she found that Ravinos had already gone. It almost seemed to have been a dream until she looked around and realized exactly where she was. Pulling the sheet around her, she made her way towards his bathroom and took a shower. The dream she had with Selae speaking to her had brought so many doubts to her mind. She didn't know what to do. It was obvious that both Ravinos and she still loved each other. Yet, she didn't know whom she loved more. Barzai had always been good to her and kind. He had been there for her after Ranka's attack and even after Adesia's exploits. She rubbed her hand across her face as she reached down to turn the water off. Drying herself out, she tried to push all of these thoughts aside. She needed to know more about Kytari. Kyra had promised the young girl that she would come speak to her after she had spoken to Ravinos. Hopefully, the young woman was still waiting and hadn't fallen asleep. She felt like she shouldn't stay here aboard Ravinos' ship for too long. She walks back into the bedroom and puts her robes back on and brushes her hair out with her fingers before leaving his quarters. Walking down the corridors, many Sith looked at her with disgust. They would have attacked her if they knew Ravinos wouldn't have their hide for it later. Kyra stops in front of a room and knocks on the door awaiting a reply. This was where she felt the young girl the strongest.*

"Kytari?"

[Triune]

*She hadn't gone to sleep, well she dozed some but popped wide awake when she heard the knock, she started to run to the door but after a couple steps forced herself to walk, reminding herself while this was her mother it wasn't her mother no matter how much she wanted her to be. She didn't remember giving birth to her because it hadn't happened yet here and may never considering the state of this time. She bit her lip as she opened the door and smiled*

"Hello Mother. Won't you come in?" She tried so hard to sound like a grown-up to make Kyra proud of her so she wouldn't turn her away like the nightmares said she would. She nervously fussed with her tunic hem.

[Lady Zahra/Jules]

*She looked into the eyes of Kytari for a moment and smiled at her as she walked inside and sat down at her desk.*

"I didn't wake you did I? I'm sorry for taking so long..."

*She thought about adding more to that, but shook her head and blushed slightly before looking around the room for a distraction. The child didn't need to know. If she could have protected her own innocence at the age she was when she became pregnant with Arael, she would have. Yet, those matters were hindsight. She couldn't ever imagine life without having had Arael.*

"You've certainly taken advantage of your time. Have you been treated well?"

*She stood up and admired some of the handiwork Kytari had fiddled with in her spare time.*

[Triune]

"No, no I wasn't asleep." She smiles self-consciously. Looking around the room she winces at the state of it, circuit boards scattered here and there, little daisy chains made of bypass wiring, a small portrait of Kyra done on a blank circuit board obviously with a vibro tool, It looks just like Kyra does now but with longer hair, Kytari has some skill in that respect. Another thing that does catch Kyra's eye but obviously not meant to be seen is the half completed Lightsaber in a partially open drawer.
"Father doesn't have much time for me so I have to keep busy." She bites her lip again looking at Kyra for a time before ducking her head. She wants to talk about something that's obvious but she's struggling to be a proper young lady. "Did you and Father have the talk you wanted?"

[Lady Zahra/Jules]

*She turned around to face the young woman feeling her uneasiness in this moment. Something was on her mind and she was almost stepping cautiously around Kyra as if seeking her approval. Her hand moves under the woman's chin gently lifting it up so she can look in her eyes*

"Kytari, it's alright. You don't have to be so nervous. What is it, child? What's really on your mind?"

[Triune]

*She fights it she really does. The what ifs the doubts all yelling at her telling her to keep quiet otherwise she'll walk out but in the end Kytari, the six-year old that lost her mother wins out as tears begin to well up in her large eyes and a sob escapes her throat*

"Oh Momma, I'm sorry I tried I really did. I didn't want to cry and be a baby wanting to hold on to you. Please don't go away I'll be good I really will!" She huddles in on herself as the sobs wrack her slender frame. She wasn't making sense she knew she wasn't but nothing came out right, she sounded like a child, a clingy, fumbling child that no Jedi and certainly not one as prominate as Kyra, Jedi Master and High Council member would even admit as hers. The doubts and nagging voices laughed at her in her head and she knew they were right she'd lost any chance with her mother's temporal twin.

[Lady Zahra/Jules]

*Selae laughed to herself locked away in Kyra's head. Oh this child that Adesia had so perfectly conceived and manipulated was just the right tool to keep Kyra close to Ravinos. Kyra was confused by the girl's behavior. Moving closer to her knowing she needed to be comforted, she wrapped her arms around the girl and just held her for a moment. Anger towards Adesia welled up inside of her and Selae gobbled it up greedily...more stoking for the fire within. She gently rubs the girls back.*

"I'm right here, Kytari. You aren't going to run me off."

[Triune]

*She turns and hugs Kyra holding on to her as if someone were about to pull her away and a sobbing story emerges, half told in words, half sent through the force. The story of a six-year old girl just begining her training in the force at the feet of her parents, Kit and Kyra. Of that Mother killed in front of her the terror and fear the child felt still there after all this time. The Fear deep inside that it was her fault, that because she didn't like the training that a child's wish that something would happen and she wouldn't have to train that day spawned the Sith Assassins and the new Sith Lady, Adesia from thin air. Ten years of guilt over one event that she thought her fault. Tears fall so freely, the teenager begs Kyra to forgive her. True the story isn't logical but since when does the mind of a six year old ever hold logic nor is guilt ever rational.*

[Lady Zahra/Jules]

*Kyra didn't know what to think of this story. It was clear in her retelling that she firmly believed the events did happen. She didn't know what all she had been put through but wanted to hear more of her story. For now she would play along.*

"Kytari, it wasn't your fault. You were only a child then. Adena would have crushed you. Kit wouldn't let anything happen to you. I wouldn't want to see that happen to you."

*She comforts the child a little more letting it out. She had pent up emotions for many years. It was almost as deep rooted as Kyra's own problems.*

"Can you tell me what else you remember, Ky?"

[Triune]

*She leans against Kyra so spent from her crying but she starts with her earliest memories, she remembers a birthday party on Coruscant, everything seeming so big. She was maybe 4 at the time. She remembers a lullabye her mother sang to her, one from Kyra's own past though it was more of a spacer ditty set to a lullabye melody, something Gurv would have sang to her. After age six everything became running and hiding, Nan, the nanny droid Kit built for her was often her only companion, she had alot of different names then, Gail, Stephany, Leia (An old family name from Kit's time on Alderaan), and others, always moving from safe house to safe house always ahead of the Sith hunters... till they caught up with them all, it was on Roon, Kit put Kytari into that escape pod that Kyra modified long ago and the next thing she remembered was being revived by her Father but he was a Sith and the world was all twisted around.*

[Lady Zahra/Jules]

*She pulls away from Kytari just a little as all of the story begins to sink in. How was it that so much of her own past and that of Kit's were so woven together in this child's mind?*

"Kytari, you have to forgive me, but this is alot to take in. The past you remember and that I remember aren't the same."

*She doesn't know if she should tell the girl the truth and didn't know if she even had the heart at this moment.*

[Triune]

"I know, I know... Father told me some of it and the rest I found out slicing into the databases. I know you aren't really my mother at least not yet, maybe never." She sobs again but manages to keep from bawling "I think Father wanted to go back and fix things, he kept saying something went wrong in the past and that's why things were so broken. The Sith just got to us too quickly so he had to send me back instead and I don't know what to fix!" She closes her eyes for a moment before looking at Kyra "I just want to hug my parents again and you are my mother even if I'm displaced in time from when I was born and he is my father even though he's.... well Sith. I'm afraid here sometimes, not afraid of Father but for him. I know how the Sith work someone will use me against him either as a captive or worse. I dont' want to go to the Darkside momma but seeing that you and Daddy fell what chance do I have to stay to the light?" She sighs looking so mournfully depressed.

[Lady Zahra/Jules]

*The Jedi in her was quick to answer as Selae so wanted to come out and play some more with the troubled girl's mind.*

"Kytari, you control your own future. It's the decisions you make that will decide what path you'll go down not ours. Your father chose a path I never thought I'd ever see him take. It pains me to see him like this too..."

*She leads Kytari over to the bed to sit down and then sits down beside her as she smiles. Tears are in her eyes as she speaks.*

"Your father wasn't always like you see him now. He was a great Jedi Master. He has a large heart and always was so caring and loving. I started falling in love with him not long after I met him. You may not see that in him now, but I still believe he's in there. He went to the dark side for a noble reason, but the reason didn't matter in the end. Kytari, you must understand that those who fall are always tainted by it even if they are redeemed."

Selae was growing restless inside. She wanted out to play badly. She tried hard to push her way through Kyra's thoughts.

*Kyra's hand moved to her forehead and rubbed it for a few moments as if she had a headache.*

[Triune]

*She nods knowing all of what Kyra said is true but doubt is always a powerful enemy.*

"Mother, is there a way for us to maybe guide father back to the light? One of your friends, I think she was still alive when I left, so many died at Damien's Stand on Kashykk, She said once that while we cannot force anyone from the darkness we can stand as a beacon to guide them should they look our way. I want to see the Jedi Master I feel is there Mother... Is that wrong?"

[Lady Zahra/Jules]

*Kyra struggles to hang on to herself as she tries to answer Kytari yet her voice has just a bit of an edge to it.*

"No, Kytari, it isn't wrong. I long to see the man I fell in love with once too. I just don't know if it's possible any longer. He's apprentice to the Empress of the Sith. It isn't easy to just walk away from that."